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Gastroenteritis, a Retrospective | The Whine Shop

Now that I am beginning a semi-solid diet again, I am tempted to write about the array of Netflix shows I watched whilst curled on the floor of my bathroom, wrapped in a blanket, suffering from some sort of pre-school incubated E-bola.  Sounds fun, right?

Thank God for Netflix because I watched at least 12 hours straight, stopping at regular intervals for my doubled ended gastro-assault.  I began by catching the 49 Up installment of the Up series. I watched 35 Up without knowing much about it, or realizing that it was quite long (short attention span here) and was enthralled.  This combines all of my loves and passions into one, it’s like a Lifetime movie meets Survivor.  To give a brief summary, a documentary was made in the early 50’s following 7 year old children in London, the series was continued every 7 years, they have recently released 56 Up. The premise is that in England, the class structure was so rigid that if you looked at a child when they were 7, you could pretty much predict the outcome of the rest of their life.  There is a boy who becomes a jockey and quits to become a London cab driver (who apparently make very good money) and then a small-time TV star.  There is an adorable boy from Liverpool who wants to be an astronaut or a coach driver but sadly turns out to have some deep mental issues that leave him essentially homeless.  I guess it particularly hit me because my own son is 7, will he be a London cabbie? Right now he is on track to be a DJ specializing in hits from the 50’s, I am sure there will be a hot market for this skill.

Next up was Young Adult, ever heard of it? Yeah, me neither.  This is sort of the Sweet Home Alabama-esque but in Minnesota in which Charlize Theron decides she want her old, now happily married with a baby, high-school boyfriend back.  I can’t quite tell if it didn’t suck as much as I thought it should because by this time I had depleted most of my cells of the majority of their water reserves.  I know she drank a lot in the movie which actually made me queasier but she was pretty much disheveled and grimy looking, so I felt a kinship to her. Not a movie I need to see again off the bathroom floor.

I typically enjoy Frazier, but my slow moving brain could not keep up and the laugh track was freaking me out. On a side note, the scene where Niles is preparing for his date and starts a fire while ironing his pants has to be one of the funniest moments on television, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mWiPaQ872c . You have to love anything with a “running with scissors” reference.

I am vague about some of the other shows, there may have been some American Dad and Family Guy, but these were clearly my darkest hours and I was googling “dehydration” and “when to go to the ER.”

Next in the queue (love that word) was “Everything Must Go,” starring Will Ferrell. I have a soft spot for comedic actors who play in dramatic roles like Jim Carey and Bill Murray. I think when you are the “funny one” all of the time, you are covering up some darker issues and it is interesting to see the human side they show when they aren’t making silly faces.  I think Will Ferrell was good in this movie, I think the movie itself went too long with too little material.  I can’t help but stare at his face and wonder if he has had an eye-lift.  There is a Kenny Rogers tightness and unequal pull to his eyes that doesn’t seem quite the way nature intended.  But raisins are natural and they are pretty weird looking, so who am I to judge.  There was a lot of drinking in this movie, but by now nausea was the new black and I was unfazable.  I am not sure how I selected the”boozy, dark comedies” category.

Rounding out what I remember watching this fateful evening  now turned 4 a.m, was a documentary called “Phyllis and Harold.  This one still has me thinking and left me pretty disturbed and if something can leave you thinking and disturbed after 12 hours of diarrhea and vomit, then it’s on to something.  I have a “unique” family of my own but I am not sure that I would want to expose so much to so many.  The movie follows a couple, Phyllis and Harold, though 59 years of marriage relying on old photographs, home movies and interviews by the couple’s daughter, the maker of the documentary.  It’s a truly fascinating look at the trade-offs people are willing to make in life. Love them or hate them, it will be hard to forget them.

At this time I moved back to the bed, despite my efforts at cushioning, my hip couldn’t take the floor anymore and Vesuvius had subsided.  I don’t think I have ever watched as many movies/shows in a row, with 2 young children a Curious George marathon is the closest I get. I think I will stick to the Kindle for a while.

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